tide get ready to roll!!
the good luck charm rides again. hopefully the tide won't need luck tomorrow, but the iron bowl can be a merciless wench.
because if we had a time machine...you better believe things would have been different. we’d have gone pro in a heartbeat. we’d be making millions of dollars and living in a big ol’ mansion somewhere, soaking it up in a hot tub with our soulmate.
the good luck charm rides again. hopefully the tide won't need luck tomorrow, but the iron bowl can be a merciless wench.
Posted by gerry dorsey at 2:00 PM 0 comments
Labels: gerry dorsey, ncaa football, roll tide, you tubeage
Posted by gerry dorsey at 9:00 AM 3 comments
Labels: auburn, gerry dorsey, ncaa football, roll tide
a happy thanksgiving to you and yours. frankly you shouldn't even be reading this you should be hanging with your friends and fam. but for the 11 of you who do actually come by and read this big ball of jackassery, i'm thankful. i'm even more thankful for the 3 or 4 of you who comment...it makes it fun. now go get so stuffed you can't even fart for fear of shitting your pants. and go drink enough booze to surpress the urge to bludgeon that relative you hate. GOBBLE! GOBBLE!!
Posted by gerry dorsey at 12:00 PM 3 comments
Labels: gerry dorsey, not another damn holiday
Posted by gerry dorsey at 8:00 AM 1 comments
Labels: auburn, eye candy, gerry dorsey, ncaa football
this could be the extent of my posting today. i'm traveling down to houston for turkey day with the girlfriends family. on top of that, i've got to try to get at least a tiny bit of work done, take the dog to the vet, and any other chores i can squeeze in. regardless of whether or not i get a chance to do any more posting today, you can rest assured you will get your usual thursday morning wake up call tomorrow. safe travels to those who will be tackling that bear today. never graduate.
Posted by gerry dorsey at 8:30 AM 2 comments
Labels: auburn, gerry dorsey, roll tide, you tubeage
as i'm sure anyone reading this blog knows, aubbie has won 6 straight iron bowls. well that's negative talk, and i'm thinking positive...as in the last time bama won the iron bowl. damn it was a long time ago, but its still fun to watch. good old andrew zow.
Posted by gerry dorsey at 1:30 PM 2 comments
Labels: auburn, gerry dorsey, ncaa football, roll tide, you tubeage
Posted by gerry dorsey at 8:30 AM 1 comments
Labels: gerry dorsey, nfl, who dat
-"it was like arena football out there today," said the coach of the team that scored 68 points on saturday. unfortunately his opponents, abilene christian, scored 93 points in the division II second round playoff game. the wildcats scored on every posession except for one while rolling up 810 yards of total offense. the icing on the cake was abiline christian tossing laterals around on the last play of the game to try to hit the century mark. this of course led to a post game fight. not very christian at all.
Posted by gerry dorsey at 2:30 PM 1 comments
Labels: coaching craziness, gerry dorsey, ncaa football, tigahs
Posted by gerry dorsey at 11:30 AM 3 comments
Labels: auburn, gerry dorsey, ncaa football, roll tide, you tubeage
Posted by gerry dorsey at 8:00 AM 0 comments
Labels: gerry dorsey, ncaa football, week in pics
well again, i get to take the weekend off from any football stress this weekend with the tide having the off week, and it is really only an average week of college football. the girlfriend has some kind of spa crap going on tomorrow morning, so i'll have plenty of peace and quiet to enjoy gameday and the early games, including ohio state/michigan @ 11am. after that i will be taking in the lsu/ole miss game. i will however have to duck out at around halftime, b/c at damn near 30 years old, i will be attending my very first couples shower. save all the comments about how gay i am...i already know. so anyways, i will absolutely be back on the couch in time to take in the game of the week live from norman, ok. before i do any of this, i will be meeting up with my old roomie from my freshman year of college to knock down some food and booze. i haven't seen this dude since may of '98 and he's passing through the area on business. should be good times.
since its a bye week, you will not be subjected to the good luck charm, and we will revert back to the offseason friday formula of badass music in the form of you tubeage. today we take a look back at gerry's formative years in music. as a youngster i was heavily influenced by the musical tastes of my older siblings (the last dragon for one), and those tastes were primarily composed of 80's hair bands. poison and guns n' roses were probably my favorites, and to be honest i had no business listening to either given my age. that all changed in 1992. no, not nirvana. they had come along a year earlier and although i grew to appreciate their work, at the time i was only moderately on board. the song (and its video) that truly helped me find my own musical path was pearl jam's "even flow." me and my buddies used to imitate eddie vedder's insane stage dive from the top of the waterslide into the pool. to this day the greatest concert i've ever been to was pearl jam at tad gorley stadium (new orleans) in september of '95. on top of pearl jam kicking ass in a cool venue, and the fact that they were at their peak (in my opinion their first 3 albums were their best), it was extra special b/c this was back when pearl jam was boycotting ticketmaster and getting tickets was no easy task. not to mention a little band called the ramones opened for them. here is footage from that very show of pearl jam doing the punk classic "sonic reducer" with joey ramone. but the song that started it all for me...was "even flow."
Posted by gerry dorsey at 2:00 PM 7 comments
Labels: gerry dorsey, ncaa football, you tubeage
in honor of the biggest game of the week, i thought we'd have a little red raider/sooner fun. the red raider fan is a unique one. they are both harmless and ridiculously obnoxious at the same time. they have a large contingent of drunken degenerates, yet are generally content with a certain amount of losing and therefore are surprisingly pleasant and realistic about the amazing run they are on. since moving to texas i have always supported red raider b/c the 'horns and aggies of the world always treat them as little brother. to some degree i feel tech has accepted this role if for no other reason than it only pisses the big boys off even more when they lose to said little brother. find a 'horn or aggie fan and they will likely tell you that they'd rather lose to their historical rival (each other), as opposed to their "little brother." observe a raider fan rubbing the sooners' nose in a loss in lubbock in '05. "the big 12 refs tried to rip us off...but we won anyway!!!"
Posted by gerry dorsey at 11:00 AM 1 comments
Labels: gerry dorsey, ncaa football, you tubeage
i don't normally talk too much about these weeknight games, but two things were different about this week. a) bama is off so that opens up my friday morning post. b)the world wide leader actually put an interesting game on during the week. first of all i love watching georgia tech's offense. i love watching the triple option anyway, but its especially interesting being run full time in a bcs conference. tailback jonathan dwyer rolled for 128 yards on 10 carries and 2 td's without so much as a single carry in the second half. dwyer is a studly combination of power and speed and is running away with the acc rushing title. as a team the jackets racked up 472 yards on 56 carries for 8.4 yards a carry. all of this against those proud boys from da u. passing game you ask?? 4 of 7 for 46 yards as a team...but that's not really necessary is it?? keep in mind this is the first year for paul johnson and his offense at georgia tech. can you imagine in a few years when johnson is able to recruit players specifically for this system and the players are able to truly master the intricacies.
as a side note, i really enjoy the thursday night crew of fowler, the bachelor, craig james, erin andrews. they really seem to be enjoying themselves and therefore i enjoy listening. fowler mentioned at some point how much he liked georgia tech's fight song. i was not familiar with it at the time, but i'm always intrigued by fight songs, so i researched it...and by research i mean you tube. i'm not gonna say it ranks up there with the greats, but in terms of pure lyrical content its way up there and is clearly one of the most underrated. listen up.
Posted by gerry dorsey at 8:00 AM 2 comments
Labels: gerry dorsey, ncaa football, you tubeage
as with last bye week, with no bama game to really discuss, i will give my lead pipe locks of the week. so far this year the win percentage is .554 (117/215 with a few pushes in there) on my top 25 picks. which isn't amazing, but many would kill for it. once again, all sec games (couldn't find a line on florida anywhere) plus the game of the week. now go take out a second mortgage so you can be like your boy richie rich.
all times central.
-tennessee +3.5 @ vandy 11:30am (jp) - the whole world is thinking vandy is FINALLY going to handle up on the vols...which i why i think just the opposite. the total on this game is only 37. get your popcorn ready.
-arkansas -1.5 @ mississippi state 1:30 pm - i think this line would be a lot bigger except petrino is unsure as to which dick will start at qb. state can't score. i don't have anything to add to that...they just can't score.
-ole miss +4 @ lsu 2:30pm (cbs) - i think ole miss is going to win this game straight up. the rebs are red hot and despite 30 points in the 4th quarter last week, i think the tigahs are shell shocked.
-texas tech +7 @ oklahoma 7pm (abc) - i actually think the sooners will win this game, but i'll take texas tech +7 vs. damn near anyone. for bonus money, the total is 77 and that ain't near enough points. take the over.
Posted by gerry dorsey at 2:00 PM 0 comments
Labels: gamblin', gerry dorsey, ncaa football, you tubeage
look, i'm a realist. i don't have a great deal of confidence bama will make it out of atlanta alive, but i've seen a lot stranger things in college football. however, should they somehow find a way to make it out of atlanta alive, this could very likely be a preview of a future "love thine enemy." plus, let's face it, i'd have a revolt on my hands if i didn't put up some thursday morning eye candy. enjoy.






click here to remove those pesky logos...as well as here.
Posted by gerry dorsey at 8:00 AM 7 comments
Labels: eye candy, gerry dorsey, ncaa football
well once again bye week sends me scurrying for topics. i figured this would be as good a time as any to bring back "the wacky ways people find uncle rico." this is where we review the bizzare search terms that bring people to the site and what they find for their trouble.
-"ugliest blazer in the world" - ugliest blazer competition - well they must have looked pretty damn hard b/c i couldn't even track down this result on like the first 10 pages of results.
-"super rape machine" - rape, murder, arson, rape - sometimes i'm ashamed to even be associated with this blog.
-"wesley caroll muay thai" - homepage - this one simply led to the homepage, which i can only assume had wesley carroll mention on it at the time. is state's now 3rd string qb also a muay thai badass?? will we see him in the octagon after he graduates??
-"charles grant jambalaya recipe" - june 2008 archive - this search pulled up a page from the archives as opposed to a specific post. the archive page contained both the phrase "charles grant" and "jambalaya recipe" though the two were not used together. we are proud to be the second overall result for any search though.
-"corso checking to see if rashad johnson was in bounds" - c/w roundtable-lsu hate week - number 1 result baby!! the only problem is corso never checked to see if rashad was in bounds...it was jpw's run against lsu that was called back for holding. fast forward to the 4:25 to see what i assume this person was searching for.
Posted by gerry dorsey at 8:00 AM 0 comments
Labels: gerry dorsey, uselessness, you tubeage
breaking news out of austin is that defensive coordinator will muschamp has received a signficant raise, and been given the jimbo fisher treatment. beginning january 1, muschamp's salary will increase to $900k (wow), and he will succeed mack brown as head coach whenever he sees it time to retire. sounds like a really big committment to a somewhat unknown entity. makes me think some big dogs must have come sniffin' around and texas panicked. i got $20 that says this plan does not work out as planned.
Posted by gerry dorsey at 4:00 PM 2 comments
Labels: coaching craziness, gerry dorsey, ncaa football
i always find myself grasping at straws during a bye week. as much as i hate it, and as useless as i think it is, i can't help but keep an eye on espn's weekly bowl projections. its pretty interesting to go back and look at each weeks projections, particularly for a team like alabama that has come so far in the rankings. every week two "experts" (mark schlabach/bruce feldman) give their side by side projections. take a gander.
-preseason:
papa johns.com vs rutgers/peach vs. va tech
-week 1: (beat clemson's ass)
outback vs. wisconsin/capital one vs. wisconsin
-week 2: (struggled with tulane)
outback vs. illinois/capital one vs. wisconsin
-week 3: (rolled western kentucky)
outback vs. wisconsin/capital one vs. ohio state
-week 4: (rolled arkansas)
cotton vs. texas/capital one vs. ohio state
-week 5: (shocked uga)
bcs title game vs. oklahoma/bcs title game vs. mizzou
-week 6: (stuggled with kentucky)
sugar vs. byu/bcs title game vs. mizzou
-week 7: (bye week)
bcs title game vs. texas/bcs title game vs. texas
-week 8: (beat ole miss)
sugar vs. utah/sugar vs. boise state
-week 9: (spanked tennessee)
sugar vs. utah/sugar vs. boise state
-week 10: (whipped arkansas state)
sugar vs. texas/sugar vs. boise state
-week 11: (squeak by lsu)
sugar vs. pitt/sugar vs. boise state
-week 12: (spanked miss. state)
sugar vs. utah/sugar vs. usc
a couple of points. first, could these guys be more bandwagon?? a big win over clemson?? new year's day bowl game. shock uga?? bcs title game!! idiots. secondly, it appears to be shaping up very poorly for the tide. i love the sugar bowl, but i'm going to be extremely pissed if the tide gets matched up with one of the "bcs busters," i.e. utah or boise. this is something i frequently refer to as the "old man fight." that is, when you're a young buck, getting into a fight with an old man is a lose/lose proposition. if you beat his ass, all you accomplished was whipping an old man's ass. and god forbid you get the hell beat out of you by the old man...you'll never live it down. i support the sugar bowl, but for the love of god can bama get a bcs opponent?!?
Posted by gerry dorsey at 10:30 AM 4 comments
Labels: bullshit rankings, fuck espn, gerry dorsey, ncaa football, roll tide
this blog has been all bama football all the time over the last 3 months, and for good reason. the only problem is that means less of all other sports and that includes the teams i love to follow. only problem is most of the teams i follow are sucking right now. here's a look at some of suck.
-first a team i don't care about sucking, da 'cuse, making a move nobody is surprised by in firing coach greg robinson. 9-35 (3-25 big east) will do that to you. personally i can't believe the guy was even brought back this year.
-one more note of suck not about one of my teams...and i really feel there should be more outrage about this. did you see the fucking tragedy of a uniform (see here, here, and here) oregon actually wore in public this weekend?? we spoke of rumors about black helmets (are those black or dark green??) in our preseason uni review, but nobody could have forseen such horrible jerseys. really?? wings??
-now on to my teams. bama hoops sucks already. they lost their season opener last night to mercer. MERCER?! from the glass is half full department, ronald steele came back from not playing last year to drop 25pts (5-11 3pt), and true frosh stud jamychal green went for 17 and 12 in his debut. the tide will return for another barn burner on wednesday night when they host florida a&m, that of college gameday fame.
-it may be strong to say the saints suck given that they are 5-5, but with only 6 games remaining, they are 2 games out of first in their division, and have lost to every team they've played that is worth a shit (save for week 1). their last 6 games are against 5 teams in the playoff hunt and the lions. they might want to think about getting hot like...ummm now.
-and now, for the greatest of all sucks, the dallas sports scene. with a win last night, the cowboys probably escape the suck label for now (not that i care), however they are still of the brink and given preseason expectations still suck relatively speaking. more suck comes in the way of the stars. the team that took the eventual stanley cup champ red wings to 6 games in the conference finals last year has jumped out to a 6-8-3 start with largely the same roster. very nice. and then there is the mavs. 3 years ago...nba finals. two years ago...67 wins. last year...first round exit and the horrible jason kidd trade. this year...a 3 and 7 start. dallas...slowly becoming a black hole of sports.
Posted by gerry dorsey at 2:30 PM 3 comments
Labels: coaching craziness, cowboys, gerry dorsey, mavericks, nba, ncaa football, ncaa hoops, nfl, nhl, roll tide, stars, who dat
where we post a youtube that has little to nothing to do with football, yet expresses our feelings regarding what happened in bama's game that week.
Posted by gerry dorsey at 11:30 AM 0 comments
Labels: gerry dorsey, ncaa football, roll tide, you tubeage
Posted by gerry dorsey at 8:00 AM 0 comments
Labels: gerry dorsey, ncaa football, week in pics
well once again the tide should not need luck to come away with a win this week, but he who breaks tradition ends up sad.
Posted by gerry dorsey at 3:30 PM 0 comments
Labels: gerry dorsey, ncaa football, roll tide, you tubeage
nobody does bullshit "hey coach" type shows like the saban. don't believe me?? go to about the 2:50 mark and let the saban make you feel like a 16 year old who just brought home an "f"...including dropping an s-bomb on you. love this guy.
Posted by gerry dorsey at 2:00 PM 1 comments
Labels: gerry dorsey, roll tide, violence, you tubeage
Posted by gerry dorsey at 8:00 AM 0 comments
Labels: gerry dorsey, mississippi state, ncaa football, roll tide
am i the only one who just found out where college gameday is going this week?? are you fucking serious?? i'd rather you just do it from a studio up in bristol.
Posted by gerry dorsey at 3:00 PM 3 comments
Labels: fuck espn, gerry dorsey, ncaa football
Posted by gerry dorsey at 8:00 AM 3 comments
Labels: eye candy, gerry dorsey, mississippi state